Chocolate Beet Cupcakes with Chai Frosting

chocolate beet cupcakes with chai frosting

My mom liked to say that the Coors Light Drinker taught me how to drive.

If you count, “Get in the left lane, turn your blinker on … now turn left!”, as a driving lesson on Route 61, then I guess he taught me how to drive… to the liquor store.

It was very clear to me that the Coors Light Drinker never taught me how to drive. I figured that out on my own, while driving a white mustang from Alabama to Pennsylvania, with my mom and the Coors Light Drinker making out in the back seat. And then there was my best friend from high school who rehearsed the driver’s test with me at the driver’s license center, over and over and over, so that I could pass.

While I can’t give the Coors Light Drinker any credit for my driving skills, I do give him some points for encouraging me in a way I’ll never, ever forget.

Let’s stop there for a moment. Did you read that? I said that the Coors Light Drinker encouraged me.

ingredients for chocolate beet cupcakes with chai frosting

It feels sacrilegious to write that, since he destroyed so much of my life. There’s a huge part of me that wants to give him ZERO CREDIT for anything. It’s a twisted thing to acknowledge that he encouraged me, like I’m making some kind of joke. The pain inside of me wants to laugh it off. There is a funny smell to it.

But it’s true.

I’ve told you before that the Coors Light Drinker sold cars, albeit very shadily. He had a way with words, like most salesmen do. I could strike up a conversation with him and enjoy it.

When I first got the most likely diagnosis of interstitial cystitis (IC) from the urologist, I was prescribed the lovely IC diet. At the time, I had already been following a whole foods based sugar-free diet. The IC diet listed healthy, whole foods as bladder irritants. That’s what stunned me the most. All these foods that I could no longer eat if I wanted a pain-free life.

It was the Coors Light Drinker who said to me, “Of all people, Archer, you’re the one who can do this [diet]. You’re creative and smart and you know how to work with food. You’ll be able to figure this out no problem.”

Now, I didn’t have a moleskin notepad in my pocket, so those words aren’t X-Acto knifed from a journal, but they are, to the best of my memory, the gist of what he said.

mixing chocolate beet cupcakes with chai frosting

My diet has since evolved, significantly. Thankfully, I no longer have interstitial cystitis.

The Coors Light Drinker was right! I figured this archerfriendly diet out, “no problem”. It has been NO PROBLEM to put white beans in my peanut butter fudge and white beans in my chocolate chip cookies. And ta-daaaa! I PUT THEM IN MY FROSTING. Yes, I did do that. This chai frosting recipe contains WHITE BEANS!!

White beans are my trick to cutting the overpowering coconut oil taste when you’re dairy-free and use coconut oil for everything. White beans are my secret coconut oil frosting ingredient. As long as they are pureed, they hide right in there. They help balance the blood sugar, since frosting kills beta cells. Throwing a little protein and fiber in your frosting is always a good idea. (My next goal for white beans is to put them in my ice cream. Yes, I just said that.)

making chai frosting for chocolate beet cupcakes

I suspect that the white beans prevent the frosting from getting too fluffy. I’m OK with that. The white beans help the frosting in every single way. Cuts the coconut oil taste and helps the blood sugar and serves as a volume substitute to use less sugar. This is an everybody-is-winning situation.

And then there’s these chocolate beet cupcakes. I am so proud of them. They are sweeter than most of the food I make, but don’t get too excited over that — if they were too sweet, I wouldn’t be able to stomach them. But they’re sweeter than my everyday archerfriendly food, so that’s why I think you’ll like them.

With that, I offer you one of my best archerfriendly creations: chocolate beet cupcakes with chai frosting. The Wendy’s Eating Husband would buy these for dessert if he had the option (he actually did eat and love them for his birthday!). Now I just need to open up an archerfriendly cafe so you could buy them too…

Make sure you read the whole recipe before making the cupcakes! It is a committed endeavor. Note that this recipe does not translate well as a cake (I tried).

chocolate beet cupcakes with chai frosting

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5 Responses

  1. Kate Ward

    These sound fantastic, Archer! Can’t wait to try them. Would these be “okay” for a baby’s 1st birthday (cup)cake? Do any of the ingredients fall within a “proceed with caution” category for young kids? If so, what would be appropriate substitutes?


    Dr. Archer Atkins

    Hi Kate!

    Yes, I think they would totally be fine for a baby’s first birthday! I actually made a very similar cupcake for my daughter’s first birthday (chai cupcake with chai frosting). Some babies may be sensitive to chocolate, but otherwise, I think it’s fine.


  2. Kuda

    Hi! It sounds great! My question is… The raw cocoa powder doesn’t bother the IC patients bladder? Once I read that cocoa powder = roasted is more irritant but raw cacao = completely raw not roasted seems to be less irritant to the bladder… What do you think in yoir experience?
    I have been chocolate-cacao-free a year and a half… I would like to add some raw cacao powder to my organic rice/almond milk, etc…
    Thanks in advance!


  3. Kuda

    Sorry, another questions is if you, like some other naturopaths, believe there is possible to completelly heal IC?
    I was diagnosed a year and a half after a really bad UTI wich synthoms stayed with me since then. In the cystoscopy they saw my bladder well except for the trigone an urethra area that was reddened and erythematous.
    Bladder instillations of Hialuronic Acid and Chondroitine sulfate did the things a lot worst, and I stopped that torture at 8th instillation!
    I follow the natural way with much better results!
    Thanks for contributing to all this way of healing!


  4. Melissa

    I’ve just been diagnosed with IC and am looking for treatments.


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